Negative again. I had a breakdown this morning. A complete breakdown. I think I needed it. I cried and prayed and cried some more. I am just tired. Tired of tests, Tired of procedures, Tired of month after month of negative tests. It has been almost 4 year. I am just 2 months shy of 4 years. I am better tonight. I am ok and resound to the fact that it is negative. I haven't given up all hope. I know I still have a few days for it to turn positive. Thanks Amberly for talking me through my craziness today. I have officially lost my mind by the way. Why does it have to be this hard????
One of the songs on the side of my blog says it best:
David Crowder Band - All I Can Say
Lord I'm tired
So tired from walking
And Lord I'm so alone
And Lord the dark
Is creeping in
Creeping up
To swallow me
I think I'll stop
Rest here a while
And didn't You see me cry'n?
And didn't You hear me call Your name?
Wasn't it You I gave my heart to?
I wish You'd remember
Where you sat it down
Chorus:
And this is all that I can say right now
And this is all that I can give
Bridge:
I didn't notice You were standing here
I didn't know that
That was You holding me
I didn't notice You were cry'n too
I didn't know that
That was You washing my feet
2 comments:
I am praying for both you and your Carrie! You have the strength to go further with this! I admire you and your perseverance! Btw I LOVE this song! It is something that helps me as well! I have a book that I am going to get back with you on! She is from Starkville and it is her story of infertility and life struggles. It just came out and I am going to find it! When I do I am going to let you know! Please know that my thoughts are with you!
I'm so sorry. I'm praying for both you and your friend.
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