Tuesday, November 18, 2008

IUI #6 - cd 7

Still taking the Repronex. My tummy is killing me - not that I am complaining, but it does hurt really bad.

I did something today that some of my friends and family think I shouldn't have done. I called my OB/GYN. I wanted to see what gender the baby was that I lost in February. They did genetics tests so I knew they would know. The nurse told me that they didn't tell me - they were waiting for me to ask. They didn't want to add salt to my wounds. Well......it was a little girl. I'm glad I found out but it is a little bittersweet. I will take whatever I can get and BE THRILLED - but my dream has always been to have a little curly red-headed girl. I'm ok. In fact I was fine talking to a friend who was with me when the nurse called and I was fine talking to the nurse. I didn't get upset until I told Burt. He was pretty upset. I think just b/c it was almost like it wasn't real at times, but now it is. Now I wonder what the other 3 are but of ocurse, I can never know. It's easier that way - in a way. Knowing that I had the option of knowing and didn't know killed me. But it doesn't really bother me that I don't know the others - I guess becuase I know that I CAN'T know.

2 more shots until my follicle check!!!

My husband is in the kitchen making me homemade potato soup for supper - YUM!!!


Tigerlilly said...

I wonder often too, if my lost little ones were boys or girls. I'm glad you were able to find out with one, as bittersweet as it is.

Heather said...

Wishing you lots of luck on this cycle. I'm truly praying for you. The only miscarriage that I wish I knew the gender of was the baby we lost the heartbeat of at 10 weeks.

And mmmm - potato soup! Sounds great!